Maybe it’s that I am closer to fifty than I am to 40 or maybe it is that I am steadily getting closer and closer to a major transition in my life, but I am ever trying to find the secret to peace and happiness. I am 45 years old and in thirteen days I will be 46. I am nineteen and a half years into my military career and in six months I will be retired. Anxiety, fear, and doubt about the future began to be debilitating and, at the same time, regrets and depression from the past arose. How does a person find calm, peace, and happiness in such a circumstance? The answer is simply put, live mindfully and be in the present. However, learning how to do this is challenging. Catchphrases and slogans are fun, but don’t provide the how. Live in the moment. Be mindful. Calm your mind. The only thing you can truly control is your own mind. How?
The answer is with help and practice. This has been my journey to discovering how to be present and mindful. It was not done alone on my own. Someone showed me the direction to go and where to begin. This person is my behavioral health professional who I sought out after I admitted to myself I have been suffering from anxiety, depression, and PTSD for years. He introduced me to two of the three practices I have incorporated into my life.
1. He encouraged me to start journaling. At first my journaling was to think about and write, with intention, my experiences in Iraq that are the cause of my PTSD. The challenge to me was doing this with intention. What does, “with intention,” mean when it comes to writing about one’s experiences. I did not discover this right away and I found myself just writing the facts of how the events transpired. It wasn’t until I started meditating that I discovered what, “with intention,” meant.
2. Later, my behavioral health specialist introduced me to a guided meditation app. The app focused on mindfulness and being present. The guided meditation taught me that it is our mind’s nature to wonder, to think about the past and the future. It also taught me how to train myself to become the master of my mind and create healthy habits in order to be present, and mindful. I encourage everyone to find a mindfulness app that gives guided meditations so they can learn these skills for themselves because I will not do it justice in this short article. The gist of it is to use the sensations of the body, or sound from your surroundings, or sights that you see to be a grounding to the present. It teaches you to be mindful and notice when the mind wonders, and how to gently bring it back to the present.
3. I began to read about the philosophy of Stoicism and about those in history who have taught Stoicism and those who strived to live by it’s philosophy. These include Marcus Aurelius, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., John F. Kennedy, Abraham Lincoln, and the list goes on. Thus far, from my readings, I have gained new insights from Stoicism teachings about what is in our control. There are only two things that we have control over, our bodies and our minds. However, we do not have all control over our bodies. We can control if we exercise, what we eat, if we get enough sleep, and etc., but we cannot control if we become ill, get a disease, or get cancer. That leaves the mind as the only absolute thing in this world under our full control, and we must gain mastery of it to live a mindful and present life.
Life is increasingly fast paced with an overwhelming abundance of distractions. Our attentions are spread too thin across too many things fighting for our time and energy. Slow down and develop healthy habits for a mindful and present mind. My journey is not complete, nor do I ever want it to be complete in my education on becoming the master of myself. To those who have read this far, my you find peace and happiness. In my experience the path that will lead you to success is being present and mindful.
