SO, THERE I WAS...

It’s common knowledge that whenever a Soldier is about to tell a war story they will begin it with, “so, there I was.”  When I tell stories about my experiences in Iraq I do not usually talk about violence or death.  Those who have been a part of war understand that violent action seen in movies is not experienced by all who have deployed overseas or necessarily an everyday experience by those who have been involved in a firefight.  The following story is one of my favorites to tell. So,

THERE I WAS:

Knee high in sewage.  The whole dismounted patrol was knee high in sewage.  How did we end up in this scenario?  It is not my intention to make fun of Lieutenants (LTs), but they are often ambitious young officers with little adult life experience and particularly little experience in Army leadership.  It just so happens that the LT of this patrol planned and lead this day’s patrol into the sewage.  I honestly do not think that our Platoon Sergeant (PSG) would have chosen this dismounted route.  (He may be reading this and might provide some insight.)  Back to the patrol.

The smell was horrific.  The standing sewage had been here for months and the aroma was a sure sign, and because it had been there for so long the ground underneath was slimy and slippery.  It didn’t take long before the slick surface at the bottom on the mess started taking casualties.  One by one, I began to see my fellow Soldiers slip and fall.

It seemed like an eternity as we patrolled through this nightmare and every few minutes another casualty of the sewage fell into the putrid mix.  While on patrol I usually walked next to the PSG and this patrol was no different.  He eventually became a casualty and fell as well.  Standing up from the fall, the PSG handed me his camera to carry because he didn’t want it to be ruined.

Eventually, I saw the light at the end of the tunnel, or I should say the end of our adventure walking through the sewage.  Ahead I saw, one by one, Soldiers reaching solid ground.  As soon as the thought of victory crossed my mind that I had made it without succumbing to the nasty gunk and gravity, that’s when it happened.  I BEGAN TO SLIP!  Two things crossed my mind as I fell, and believe me when I say that it felt like time was standing still.  First, I thought about how horrid the stench was as my face came closer and closer to the sewage.  And second, the PSG had entrusted me with his camera.  I had better not let it get ruined.

I imagine that I looked like the statue of liberty as I fell holding the PSG camera as high as possible to save it from destruction.  The good news is that no one was injured during this patrol and the PSG’s camera was safe and sound.  The bad news was that was the beginning of an eight hour patrol.  You can imagine how that went. 

And, that is my favorite war story to tell.  Take It Easy!